Hi, I first became a member or AA in July 2003, my binge drinking was out of control and I spent a lot of my time in bed recovering. I went to AA and stayed dry for 10 months and then because I hadnt done the things other people in the rooms seem to have done, I felt like a fraud. Hence my drinking over the last few years detioriated. I started taking stong pain killers whilst drinking, i have driven my car and my binges are lasting a couple of days. My last drink was saturday, it started friday teatime and finished at midnight saturday night. I started reading the big book again a few weeks ago when I knew this time that I am powerless against alcohol. I so want to go back to my meetings but have got so bad that i am afraid to leave the house a lot of the time. I thought that if i start online then i will get the confidence to return to the rooms. I know that the longer I carry on the worse its going to get.
Thanks for your honesty, you're helping me to stay sober today. I spent the first two years in the program relapsing every other month. I was sicker than most and thought otherwise. Generally too smart for my own good and for this simple program. Thanks to my higher power and my Irish stubborness, I didn't quit. Please stick around, I'm sure you've got some jokes I haven't heard yet.
Welcome to MIP, Kaz. I really hope you get something of what you need dipping your toe back in here with us. That's taken a great deal of courage & we are stronger together. No matter what you do you don't have to take a drink again 1Day@aTime. In a way, things may be worse for you than they were before but this can be a great lesson though painful too. You don't have to do this on your own. Take your babysteps again & little by little your life will get better again. Don't worry, Kaz. Keep on doing the next right thing. Best of luck & love to you in recovery, Danielle x
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
Welcome Kaz!! Glad you made it back!! A thought came to me....(Look out) You know how they tell you to "play the tape back on your drinking days?" Well, lucky you...Youve experience sobriety in the past and have the chance to play back that tape too!!! Think about how great things were when you were sober!! I may be wrong, but it just might work for you. Im sure your old buddies in AA will shout with joy when they see you coming back!! Lani
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"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have. "
Welcome to MIP. I do hope that you'll stay around as it is a super place.
I first came to AA in March 2004, then after eight weeks of sobriety a stupid thought entered my mind. I thought that as I heard so much in the rooms of AA that surely just one drink couldn't hurt as my story wasn't as bad as most that I had heard. That one drink lasted for eighteen horrendous months. By the time I got back to AA I was on the verge of losing everything.
But, I have been back for just over two years and my life has completely turned around.
When I finally plucked up the courage to go back, I was welcomed with open arms and given so much support and encouragement. I have seen it happen over and over again in AA.
You could try 'phoning the AA help-line and talking to someone. They have been right where you are now and it helped me enormously to know that I wasn't alone and just to be able to talk.
Please keep posting and letting us know how things are going for you, won't you?
Take care,
Carol
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
Happy One Year ~ 1Day@aTime ~ Kaz, You Rock!!!!!!!! Happy Birthday, Darling. So proud to be here to share it with you. What a Joy. What a Message. Arn't you Fab!!!! Enjoy Your Very Special Day ~ All 24hrs of it! ;Danielle xxx
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Progress not perfection.. & Practice makes Progress!
