Step 3- to kneel or not to kneel, that is the question.
Fyne Spirit said
Nov 4, 2013
While I pray all day long, asking guidance and inspiration with this or that, I feel, at certain times, the need to humble myself by kneeling in prayer. This might be during private prayer time at the ends of the day, but also when taking some important prayer related step like step 3,or step 7 when I am asking the God of my understanding to do something special for me.
Step three, the decision, is probably the most important decision I will ever make in my life, and it feels to me like a sign of my sincerity and earnestess to get on my knees for this one.
What is the general experience? Is it ok to take this step in a more casual manner? What was the practice in the old days? I have an idea they used to be quite big on kneeling.
I am reminded of the painting on the roof of the cistene (forgive spelling if wrong) chapel where God is reaching out to man, while man is just laying there with one lazy finger extended. The distance between man and God is about an inch and could be easily covered if man would just make a tiny effort.
What do you guys feel?
God bless,
MikeH.
Pythonpappy said
Nov 4, 2013
Wow ... Great topic MikeH ...
My sponsor got me in the habit of getting in a private room each morning and evening, alone, and kneeling to pray ... he told me it shows willingness and sincerity about your gratitude and your plea's ... not to mention it makes you feel more humble ... of course, like you, I pray throughout the day, but when it comes time for just me and Him ... kneeling is my preference ... I think it also demonstrates honor and respect ... after all, it IS God we're talk'n 'bout ...
I know there are some with advanced age and physical issues that make it difficult for them to kneel ... and I'm very sure God realizes this, but those difficulties shouldn't stop us from praying ...
Sober Strummer said
Nov 4, 2013
Body language is a real thing.
Pythonpappy said
Nov 4, 2013
Amen SS, ... ... ... it is much louder than words in many cases ...
Db1105 said
Nov 4, 2013
The God of my understanding really doesn't give a hoot how I pray.
Stepchild said
Nov 4, 2013
I agree Db....I mean...What is the correct way to pray?...It's like asking what is the correct way to cry...Or laugh. I think we all have our ways to do it...It's all about seeking....God could and would if he were sought. C. is the answer. The wording in the original manuscript was this....
Get down upon your knees and say to your Maker, as you understand Him: "God, I offer myself to Thee - to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!" Think well before taking this step. Be sure you are ready; that you can at last abandon yourself utterly to Him.
That was changed....I actually did my 3rd step prayer on my knees....I think it shows respect...Plus my sponsor told me too...But I think for myself...It's just as clear a signal if I'm driving my car or I'm in line at the bank....I can pray anywhere....As long as I keep seeking...That's spiritual progress.
You know there is no Amen at the end of the third step prayer...It sets us up to work steps 4 and 5...The Amen comes at the end of the 7th step prayer. Interesting. Does it bother me to kneel and pray?....No. Not at all. Do I have to kneel?....No. I like to pray. I think it's the best tool we got in that simple kit of spiritual tools that was laid at our feet.
davep12and12 said
Nov 5, 2013
This topic reminds me of a story a friend of mine tells about when his sponsor first showed him how to do a 'third step prayer'. My friend had been sober for a while, but was still engaging in some pretty self-destructive behavior, basing his decisions and actions on the first knee-jerk alcoholic ideas that would pop into his head, and the effects on his life were getting pretty serious. His sponsor called him out on it and told him they were going to do a third step prayer and said: "Normally, when I'm showing a sponsee how to do this prayer, I like to light some candles and incense and set a mood, but we don't have time for that sh*t. This is a f*ckin' emergency! So here goes - are you going to decide to stop listening to the alcoholism in your head and start listening to something else that can return you to sanity, or not?". It made the impact that needed to be made and my friend says he has never forgotten that decision.
The take-away is - whatever works.
Stepchild said
Nov 5, 2013
I love that Dave....Straight and to the point. The important thing is...He never forgot it.
gonee said
Nov 5, 2013
When I was drinking I was very vulgar and disrespectful. All that changed when I worked the 12 steps of AA. I don't pray on my knees, but I know of men and women who do. I have a great deal of respect for them, because they have something special with God which I don't have.
One of the things that changed my life was the statement made by Jesus: "If you love me, keep my commands." For me the steps are the gateway to keeping God's commands. Some of the people who I have encountered, who do this, are people who have a deep respect for God.
Fyne Spirit said
Nov 9, 2013
Thanks for your comments guys.
I have had a look at Wally P's Back to Basics, and the Little Red Book, both records fo how they did things in the meeting setting, when we had such a great recovery rate, and neither mention kneeling as part of the procedure around step 3. So it seems, at least in meetings and workshops, it wasn't regarded as important. And that is really the issue I was trying to get a handle on for the purpose of step workshops I am involved in here.
In respect of sponsor and newcomer, it seems in the very early days prayer was a big part of things and kneeling was common. I hear countless stories along those lines, especially from people who have been sober a while.
Perhaps it's a paradoxical thing like so much of AA. For example, like Bill and Bob, we try to carry this message to alcoholics. A lot of the time they don't get sober. But we stay sober.
We go out to make amends, to do our best to clean up the past, and sometimes our efforts are not appreciated by the other party, but we stay sober.
We, (some of us) get on our knees to pray at times. We don't actually know if this is what our God requires us to do, it's more an act of humility and contrition, but we stay sober.
In each of the above examples we set out to do something for the benefit of someone else and we don't always know whether we have done any good for the other person, or God. But it seems we always benefit personally when we try and puy our lives on this path. It seems the things we do and the way we act have a direct bearing on our ability to live happily in this world.
God bless,
MikeH
Stepchild said
Nov 9, 2013
This is from todays Daily Reflections....How appropriate.
STEPPING INTO THE SUNLIGHT
But first of all we shall want sunlight; nothing much can grow in the dark. Meditation is our step out into the sun.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 10
Sometimes I think I don't have time for prayer and meditation, forgetting that I always found the time to drink. It is possible to make time for anything I want to do if I want it badly enough. When I start the routine of prayer and meditation, it's a good idea to plan to devote a small amount of time to it. I read a page from our Fellowship's books in the morning, and say "Thank You, God," when I go to bed at night. As prayer becomes a habit, I will increase the time spent on it, without even noticing the foray it makes into my busy day. If I have trouble praying, I just repeat the Lord's Prayer because it really covers everything. Then I think of what I can be grateful for and say a word of thanks.
I don't need to shut myself in a closet to pray. It can be done even in a room full of people. I just remove myself mentally for an instant. As the practice of prayer continues, I will find I don't need words, for God can, and does, hear my thoughts through silence.
Copyright 1990 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS WORLD SERVICES, INC.
Sober Strummer said
Nov 9, 2013
My wife does that sort of thing. Prays for me often. There is also something healing to pray with someone else and hear them lift you up in prayer.
I remember when my mother was in the hospital, holding her hand when they would do an IV, praying with her holding her hand.
There is something at a very deep level that connects. I feel like something I don't quite fully comprehend is going on.
Fyne Spirit said
Nov 10, 2013
I felt something like that just before I got married. My fiance and I had a meeting with the vicar to discuss the upcoming nuptials. When it concluded, we all kneeled and he said a prayer over us. I am not religious and don't belong to his church, but I felt something unusual, kind of comforting, special, during and after that prayer, we both did. I remember it when I remember her.
God bless,
MikeH
justadrunk said
Nov 10, 2013
When I pray with my kids there eyes get wide and there is static in the room. I may start up in the midst of choas - and they hear it and pay attention and their little ears perk up and listen to the calm. It's amazing. I didn't do the 3rd step on my knee's. My sponsor told me that wouldn't be best for me though that was how it was done for her. She was given a part of a spider plant that was once Bill W's. She didn't give me a part of that plant. Maybe it was because we were in a coffee shop. Maybe she forgot to water that plant. I don't know - and I didn't ask. I believe God set it out perfectly for me the way it was. I have faith in that.
gldart said
November 19th
Bom, eu e os meus amigos queríamos comprar um kit de churrasco profissional para os nossos encontros de verão. Um deles mostrou-me o roulettino app download no seu telemóvel, elogiando os torneios relâmpago para jogadores portugueses. Comecei com entusiasmo, mas uma sequência de mãos perdidas deixou-me desmotivado. No último minuto, subi a aposta num jogo de verão e acabei por ganhar um prémio que nos permitiu adquirir um kit de churrasco completo e de alta qualidade. Para grupos de amigos em Portugal, esta aplicação pode transformar qualquer convívio.
-- Edited by gldart on Wednesday 19th of November 2025 09:45:48 PM
While I pray all day long, asking guidance and inspiration with this or that, I feel, at certain times, the need to humble myself by kneeling in prayer. This might be during private prayer time at the ends of the day, but also when taking some important prayer related step like step 3,or step 7 when I am asking the God of my understanding to do something special for me.
Step three, the decision, is probably the most important decision I will ever make in my life, and it feels to me like a sign of my sincerity and earnestess to get on my knees for this one.
What is the general experience? Is it ok to take this step in a more casual manner? What was the practice in the old days? I have an idea they used to be quite big on kneeling.
I am reminded of the painting on the roof of the cistene (forgive spelling if wrong) chapel where God is reaching out to man, while man is just laying there with one lazy finger extended. The distance between man and God is about an inch and could be easily covered if man would just make a tiny effort.
What do you guys feel?
God bless,
MikeH.
Wow ... Great topic MikeH ...
My sponsor got me in the habit of getting in a private room each morning and evening, alone, and kneeling to pray ... he told me it shows willingness and sincerity about your gratitude and your plea's ... not to mention it makes you feel more humble ... of course, like you, I pray throughout the day, but when it comes time for just me and Him ... kneeling is my preference ... I think it also demonstrates honor and respect ... after all, it IS God we're talk'n 'bout ...
I know there are some with advanced age and physical issues that make it difficult for them to kneel ... and I'm very sure God realizes this, but those difficulties shouldn't stop us from praying ...
Amen SS, ... ... ... it is much louder than words in many cases ...
I agree Db....I mean...What is the correct way to pray?...It's like asking what is the correct way to cry...Or laugh. I think we all have our ways to do it...It's all about seeking....God could and would if he were sought. C. is the answer. The wording in the original manuscript was this....
Get down upon your knees and say to your Maker, as you understand Him: "God, I offer myself to Thee - to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!" Think well before taking this step. Be sure you are ready; that you can at last abandon yourself utterly to Him.
That was changed....I actually did my 3rd step prayer on my knees....I think it shows respect...Plus my sponsor told me too...But I think for myself...It's just as clear a signal if I'm driving my car or I'm in line at the bank....I can pray anywhere....As long as I keep seeking...That's spiritual progress.
You know there is no Amen at the end of the third step prayer...It sets us up to work steps 4 and 5...The Amen comes at the end of the 7th step prayer. Interesting. Does it bother me to kneel and pray?....No. Not at all. Do I have to kneel?....No. I like to pray. I think it's the best tool we got in that simple kit of spiritual tools that was laid at our feet.
This topic reminds me of a story a friend of mine tells about when his sponsor first showed him how to do a 'third step prayer'. My friend had been sober for a while, but was still engaging in some pretty self-destructive behavior, basing his decisions and actions on the first knee-jerk alcoholic ideas that would pop into his head, and the effects on his life were getting pretty serious. His sponsor called him out on it and told him they were going to do a third step prayer and said: "Normally, when I'm showing a sponsee how to do this prayer, I like to light some candles and incense and set a mood, but we don't have time for that sh*t. This is a f*ckin' emergency! So here goes - are you going to decide to stop listening to the alcoholism in your head and start listening to something else that can return you to sanity, or not?". It made the impact that needed to be made and my friend says he has never forgotten that decision.
The take-away is - whatever works.
One of the things that changed my life was the statement made by Jesus: "If you love me, keep my commands." For me the steps are the gateway to keeping God's commands. Some of the people who I have encountered, who do this, are people who have a deep respect for God.
I have had a look at Wally P's Back to Basics, and the Little Red Book, both records fo how they did things in the meeting setting, when we had such a great recovery rate, and neither mention kneeling as part of the procedure around step 3. So it seems, at least in meetings and workshops, it wasn't regarded as important. And that is really the issue I was trying to get a handle on for the purpose of step workshops I am involved in here.
In respect of sponsor and newcomer, it seems in the very early days prayer was a big part of things and kneeling was common. I hear countless stories along those lines, especially from people who have been sober a while.
Perhaps it's a paradoxical thing like so much of AA. For example, like Bill and Bob, we try to carry this message to alcoholics. A lot of the time they don't get sober. But we stay sober.
We go out to make amends, to do our best to clean up the past, and sometimes our efforts are not appreciated by the other party, but we stay sober.
We, (some of us) get on our knees to pray at times. We don't actually know if this is what our God requires us to do, it's more an act of humility and contrition, but we stay sober.
In each of the above examples we set out to do something for the benefit of someone else and we don't always know whether we have done any good for the other person, or God. But it seems we always benefit personally when we try and puy our lives on this path. It seems the things we do and the way we act have a direct bearing on our ability to live happily in this world.
God bless,
MikeH
This is from todays Daily Reflections....How appropriate.
STEPPING INTO THE SUNLIGHT
But first of all we shall want sunlight; nothing much can grow in the dark. Meditation is our step out into the sun.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 10
Sometimes I think I don't have time for prayer and meditation, forgetting that I always found the time to drink. It is possible to make time for anything I want to do if I want it badly enough. When I start the routine of prayer and meditation, it's a good idea to plan to devote a small amount of time to it. I read a page from our Fellowship's books in the morning, and say "Thank You, God," when I go to bed at night. As prayer becomes a habit, I will increase the time spent on it, without even noticing the foray it makes into my busy day. If I have trouble praying, I just repeat the Lord's Prayer because it really covers everything. Then I think of what I can be grateful for and say a word of thanks.
I don't need to shut myself in a closet to pray. It can be done even in a room full of people. I just remove myself mentally for an instant. As the practice of prayer continues, I will find I don't need words, for God can, and does, hear my thoughts through silence.
Copyright 1990 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS WORLD SERVICES, INC.
I remember when my mother was in the hospital, holding her hand when they would do an IV, praying with her holding her hand.
There is something at a very deep level that connects. I feel like something I don't quite fully comprehend is going on.
God bless,
MikeH
Bom, eu e os meus amigos queríamos comprar um kit de churrasco profissional para os nossos encontros de verão. Um deles mostrou-me o roulettino app download no seu telemóvel, elogiando os torneios relâmpago para jogadores portugueses. Comecei com entusiasmo, mas uma sequência de mãos perdidas deixou-me desmotivado. No último minuto, subi a aposta num jogo de verão e acabei por ganhar um prémio que nos permitiu adquirir um kit de churrasco completo e de alta qualidade. Para grupos de amigos em Portugal, esta aplicação pode transformar qualquer convívio.
-- Edited by gldart on Wednesday 19th of November 2025 09:45:48 PM