The Twelve Promises For Beginners

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1. You will know your full name and address.

2. You will be able to shave yourself

3. You will be able to dress and undress yourself.

4. You will know the town, state and country you are in.

5. You will be able to find socks that match.

6. You will be able to smoke without burning yourself, your clothes or the furniture.

7. You will lose the fear of food.

8. You will spend less time in the bathroom.

9. You will be able to walk a straight line and pass the balloon test.

10. You will lose the fear of police cars.

11. You will be able to answer the door without looking through the little hole.

12. You will realize what a mess you've been and thank God for your 12-step alcohol program.

I love it!! 

(Although finding matching socks still presents a challenge. . .)

M

Amen to all 12,(and especially #12!) except now at 54, I now am starting to worry about a lot of those things for other reasons. 

I do, at least, still remember all the words to the song.... "will you still need me, will you still feed me, when I'm 64?" 

PS...socks?  What socks?

Peace and tranquility,

Dan

7. You will lose the fear of food.

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especially chocolate!

 

Christine