For some of us there is no hope or light at the end of the tunnel. We will drink forever and slowly watch our lives deteriorate until we die. I realize now that this is my fate, I accept it, I will stop trying to fight what is in my nature. I know that I will flush everything good in my life down the toilet one double rye & soda at a time and there isn't a thing that anyone can do to help me.
It's pathetic but at least my battle is over.
-- Edited by TipsyMcStagger at 19:30, 2005-09-30
Phil said
Sep 30, 2005
Good to hear from you Tipsy. Those words "Powerless" "Surrender" and "Acceptance" are still difficult for this
kid some days. Fought the booze aspect of it for 7 years, and lost it all-and still wouldnt accept and give up.
I give you credit, freind, for getting off the golf cart, before it became completely buried, in the sand trap.
Hope everythings going better, one day at a time.
Sick of being sick said
Sep 30, 2005
Some of us hit bottom more than once. Some of have hit bottom, had to spend a long time crawling aroung it on our hands and knees, and then got up for awhile, only to hit it again, and then have said, "I give up. It's obvious I can't quit, so I might as well surrender to the booze, and let it finish taking me down to hell."
Some of us have also come back to AA meetings, and AA sites like this one, over and over, until we gained something from it. We came back even when we weren't quite sure why we did.
Tipsy old buddy, I have had 4 to 6 stiff rum & cokes before dinner (us Dakotabilly's call it supper out here on the prairie), listened to my wife rant about "why are you doing that?", then retired to my bedroom to read AA literature, and wonder why I was sitting there woozy, reading about how there was a way, and not able to "get it".
I didn't have the strength or courage to try the Treatment Center route. Sad that I didn't, cause it can help get you past the worst part of the physical cravings. Takes a few weeks to just get the stuff completely out of your system. Not talking about DT's or anything like that; just that your body, and especially your brain get used to whatever level of steady booze diet you are on, and will do whatever they can to take you along for another ride. (Mainly because they need you, cause you got the money to buy!)
Dunno what time zone you are in, but if you want to share a couple of emails about this crap we got handed to deal with, even though we didn't ask for it, I can reply. I kinda have a feelin that you are right where I have been. The address is divine@utma.com (trust me, my wife came up with the moniker!).
Sick of being sick said
Sep 30, 2005
PS. If you haven't caught it in other posts, my real moniker is Dan.
cooncatbob said
Sep 30, 2005
No human power can help us. Only a power greater then ourselves can restore us to sanity.
Phil said
Sep 30, 2005
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation—some fact of my life —unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake.
Doll said
Sep 30, 2005
"There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self- searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at out feet. We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed. " BB Chapter 2.
When you're ready, the tools (12 Steps) are there.
You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Much love and lots and lots of hugs
Doll
GammyRose said
Sep 30, 2005
Hey Tipsy, Keep coming here, keep posting, keep being honest. We are here for you and there is hope. I will never give up, I will not give up 5 minutes before the miracle.
(((Hugs)))
GammyRose
nancyjo59 said
Sep 30, 2005
Hey Tipsy,
You're not alone.
One of the 108 AA quotes:
....Share Your Pain....
Take Care
Nancy Jo
skibum said
Oct 1, 2005
Tipsy,
Your post inspired me to write my first reply on this site.
I would like to share with you that there is a light, there is hope, and you dont have to pick up another drink. One day at a time, this alcoholic opens her ears to hear other alcoholics tell me how there is hope and how they got sober and found all the joy there can be in a life of sobriety. It took a long time for that to sink into my thick skull. I thought "well, that might work for them, but it wont work for me....I'm different." Finally, I saw that I am the same, and it could and does work for me too. I just had to keep doing what they told me to do. There were no alternatives.
For me, acceptance is the same as surrender and surrender is the most important thing to my sobriety. I thought I had a fightin' chance of beating this disease, even after "admitting" I am an alcoholic. I was sooo wrong. In that state of mind, I could only maintain white-knuckled dry-drunk sobriety and experienced NO JOY and NO SERENITY. Not until I surrendered, not until I realized how utterly powerless I am over alcohol, not until I realized to drink was to die, could I even think about step 2 or step 3. When I surrrendered, I could finally STOP fighting alcoholism. I could stop fighting and turn it over to a power greater than myself. I am an alcoholic that must work the 1st three steps (I call it the waltz) every day. And it must start with surrender every day. If I dont surrender, I think I am in some sort of control and I am not.
Keep comin' back, Tipsy. The solution can be found right here.
-- Edited by TipsyMcStagger at 19:30, 2005-09-30
Good to hear from you Tipsy. Those words "Powerless" "Surrender" and "Acceptance" are still difficult for this
kid some days. Fought the booze aspect of it for 7 years, and lost it all-and still wouldnt accept and give up.
I give you credit, freind, for getting off the golf cart, before it became completely buried, in the sand trap.
Hope everythings going better, one day at a time.
Some of us hit bottom more than once. Some of have hit bottom, had to spend a long time crawling aroung it on our hands and knees, and then got up for awhile, only to hit it again, and then have said, "I give up. It's obvious I can't quit, so I might as well surrender to the booze, and let it finish taking me down to hell."
Some of us have also come back to AA meetings, and AA sites like this one, over and over, until we gained something from it. We came back even when we weren't quite sure why we did.
Tipsy old buddy, I have had 4 to 6 stiff rum & cokes before dinner (us Dakotabilly's call it supper out here on the prairie), listened to my wife rant about "why are you doing that?", then retired to my bedroom to read AA literature, and wonder why I was sitting there woozy, reading about how there was a way, and not able to "get it".
I didn't have the strength or courage to try the Treatment Center route. Sad that I didn't, cause it can help get you past the worst part of the physical cravings. Takes a few weeks to just get the stuff completely out of your system. Not talking about DT's or anything like that; just that your body, and especially your brain get used to whatever level of steady booze diet you are on, and will do whatever they can to take you along for another ride. (Mainly because they need you, cause you got the money to buy!
)
Dunno what time zone you are in, but if you want to share a couple of emails about this crap we got handed to deal with, even though we didn't ask for it, I can reply. I kinda have a feelin that you are right where I have been. The address is divine@utma.com (trust me, my wife came up with the moniker!).
PS. If you haven't caught it in other posts, my real moniker is Dan.
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems
today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some
person, place, thing, or situation—some fact of my life
—unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until
I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being
exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world
by mistake.
"There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self- searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at out feet. We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed. " BB Chapter 2.
When you're ready, the tools (12 Steps) are there.
You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Much love and lots and lots of hugs
Doll
Hey Tipsy, Keep coming here, keep posting, keep being honest. We are here for you and there is hope. I will never give up, I will not give up 5 minutes before the miracle.
(((Hugs)))
GammyRose
Hey Tipsy,
You're not alone.
One of the 108 AA quotes:
....Share Your Pain....
Take Care
Nancy Jo
Tipsy,
Your post inspired me to write my first reply on this site.
I would like to share with you that there is a light, there is hope, and you dont have to pick up another drink. One day at a time, this alcoholic opens her ears to hear other alcoholics tell me how there is hope and how they got sober and found all the joy there can be in a life of sobriety. It took a long time for that to sink into my thick skull. I thought "well, that might work for them, but it wont work for me....I'm different." Finally, I saw that I am the same, and it could and does work for me too. I just had to keep doing what they told me to do. There were no alternatives.
For me, acceptance is the same as surrender and surrender is the most important thing to my sobriety. I thought I had a fightin' chance of beating this disease, even after "admitting" I am an alcoholic. I was sooo wrong. In that state of mind, I could only maintain white-knuckled dry-drunk sobriety and experienced NO JOY and NO SERENITY. Not until I surrendered, not until I realized how utterly powerless I am over alcohol, not until I realized to drink was to die, could I even think about step 2 or step 3. When I surrrendered, I could finally STOP fighting alcoholism. I could stop fighting and turn it over to a power greater than myself. I am an alcoholic that must work the 1st three steps (I call it the waltz) every day. And it must start with surrender every day. If I dont surrender, I think I am in some sort of control and I am not.
Keep comin' back, Tipsy. The solution can be found right here.