I am new to this site and have just spent the last few hours reading through some of your threads. I can honestly say with complete sincerity that if this is what "sobriety" looks like I'll pass. I have never seen more depressing negativity in my life...and yes I'll say it, WHINING. If you're so miserable and your life sucks so much then why don't you do yourself a favour and go get loaded. Quit making getting sober look so awful for newcomers who might benefit from some decent conversation about the positive effects quitting drinking has had in peoples lives.
I apologize if I seem insensitive but all I see here is master manipulators using the all the tricks they learned while drinking to get some emotional stroking. I'm not buying it and I'm not going to dish out pity to people who are content to feel sorry for themselves.
-- Edited by TipsyMcStagger at 18:01, 2005-09-10
-- Edited by TipsyMcStagger at 18:03, 2005-09-10
Cabbageheadchris said
Sep 10, 2005
Good evening Mr McStagger. OK, I can see your view. We are a close group and all of us support each other. Some of the members her are going through some shit at the moment and the rest of us offer support and sympathy.
We have all taken the decision to stop drinking, it's not an easy decision, but it is one that has many benefits.
Stick with us Mc.Stagger, if you can handle being sober, even if you can't at least try to give it a go.
Life will get better for you.
Best wishes.
Chris.
Rick said
Sep 10, 2005
Hey Chris
I agree
try it Mc.stagger If u don't like it u can go back to your misery
Doll said
Sep 10, 2005
Unfortunately, the bottle is but a symptom......... I have no idea how to handle life on life's terms because I drowned all the pain and all the happiness in a bottle of booze for 25 yrs. Learning to live sober and handle situations that most non alkies would intuitively know how to do, is a learning process for me. And it's one I wouldn't miss for the world because you see I'm a grateful, recovering alcoholic..........
We don't feel sorry for ourselves, and we're not looking for pity. Just a little support when the days are long and hard.
.........until you try it, my friend, you have no clue.......
Keep coming back.
Much love to you
Doll
-- Edited by Doll at 20:35, 2005-09-10
-- Edited by Doll at 20:38, 2005-09-10
cheri said
Sep 10, 2005
Welcome to the board. Hope you stick around and get to know us. We all try to help each other here, to get thru the day as best we know how.
"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance--that principle is contempt proir to investigation." Herbert Spencer
Love, cheri
mom to 2 said
Sep 10, 2005
I'm the wife of an alcoholic and I find the posts on this site insightful and uplifting.
Never negative or depressing.
This is a group of kind and caring people who are suffering themselves.
I also think they were just very kind in their responses to your post.
mom to 2
wagon said
Sep 10, 2005
well this is very hard for some of us.depressing maybe, going out and getting loaded no thanks. by the way how long u sober!!!! god bless u wagon
TipsyMcStagger said
Sep 10, 2005
Maybe I was being too judgmental...I guess I was hoping to find something today, something that I needed. It was probably here I just chose to focus on the negative.
My apologies.
I'm a moody sunofabitch these past few days :)
Phil said
Sep 10, 2005
Welcome McStagger. Moody hu? got something right here for that. I call it a hammer.(Smile)
So-our freind? What are yu lookin for. I think youre in a place, where weve all been there and done that.
Some of us still had enough cells left, to get of the garbage truck, before it got all the way to the dump.
Others such as myself, rode it all the way, and still kept kicking tin cans, when I got there.
Are yu kinda having a bit of a battle with step one?
"We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, and that our lives had become unmanagable"?
Everythings a matter of choice my freind. Some of us had to pay a big price to get to AA. Others didnt.
We share our experience, strength, and hope with each other here. We do that with understanding and love.
You want a peice of us buddy? Just hold out your hand halfway, and youll be met with experiences of sobriety you never thought possible.
Now-that doesnt mean that shit doesnt happen in sobriety. It does. But its all a we thing. We kinda hold each other up.
For some of us--some days they hafta use a block and tackle:)--but we get through it all somehow.
No elevators here either, on the way to the top. Gotta use the 12 steps.
Never found love in the bottom of a bottle, even tho I kissed one enough times. Youll find it here.
GammyRose said
Sep 10, 2005
Hey McStagger, Thanks for your honesty, at least you are feeling something. As , already stated we are a group of recovering alcoholics, all at various stages of recovery, we are learning to live life on lifes terms.
Maybe you are right in a way. I have been posting about a lot of the negitive in my life lately. I had a sponsor once who only gave me 3 to 5 minutes to sit on the pity pot, and then she made me share something positive.
Sooooo, here goes, I'm alive, breathing, have plenty to eat, can afford the price of gasoline, I haven't been in a hurricane,ever...I have a group of AA friends who I can count on anytime, day or night, I have a group of MIP people I can count on,day or night. These people love me in spite of myself, my poor pity me attitude, and they do care if I'm okay .I have now been sober 20 years by the grace of God and a lot of work in the AA program, working the 12 steps, and taking my inventory daily.For all that I'm truly grateful to God and the program.
Only you can decide if you are an alcoholic, do the research, find an AA group, attend at least 6 meetings,and if it doesn't apply to you than, maybe you aren't one of us. There's nothing I love more than to hear that someone is not an Alcoholic, but I love to watch people who are alcoholics get sober one day at a time, to look them in the eye and see the joy,the peace and the understanding of what we have, is all about.
I'm glad you found us. Keep reading and keep posting.
(((Hugs)))
GammyRose
Sick of being sick said
Sep 10, 2005
Hey there Tipsy, my newbie friend!
Congratulations on shaking the dust off all of us. I'll bet this one nears an all time high for responses! Definately created a stir, but more importantly, gave us all pause to reflect on why we are here. I'm happy to see that it seems to have really reaffirmed our commitment, for a lot of us, to this group. And, as Gammyrose wrote, it reminded us all that we need to cut back on our personal pity party time.
At the same time, we will still reach out to each other when any one of us is truly having a pure horse s..t day, as people would anywhere, not just in AA.
If you ever have one of those days where you really do feel that there's no use trying anymore, and may as well drink, please tell your feelings to a friend, someone in your AA group, or someone here before you decide to give up. We will be happy to give you a "virtual" slap on the back (or swift kick in the pants, whichever is required to get you back on track), and some encouragement.
I can assure you that there are plenty of "success" stories in AA. They are good to hear, but not enough in the long run. You will also see people come through the AA doorway who fall and fall again. That's why we cannot put the burden of our sobriety on someone else, but have to learn from this program, the steps we can take to attain that goal personally.
I have found in my neck of the woods, that the most successful AA'ers, the ones with years of sobriety, tend to attend meetings less often, because they are busy with their happier, fuller lives.
If you want to hear a couple more success stories in AA, stick around, and in a couple of years, you can tell me your story, and I'll tell you mine.
Peace, Love and prayers to all in our group,
Dan, an alcoholic
TipsyMcStagger said
Sep 11, 2005
I want to stop drinking more than I can tell you but I feel really raw, insecure and on the edge. I was contemplating my first meeting and feeling all the anxiety and stress that goes along with that. I started looking on line for something that would give me a boost, inspire me and make me feel like there was a light at the end of the tunnel and that I was on the right path. When I found this site and read through the threads for some reason I chose to only see the pain that was being expressed and not the hope, happiness and friendship. Now that I have a meeting under my belt and I'm feeling a little more calm I'm able to see things differently.
I appreciate your comments and your support...I hope that someday I can be in a place where I'm strong enough to offer the same to someone else who's new, scared and alone.
I think I just might hang around here awhile ;)
-- Edited by TipsyMcStagger at 20:18, 2005-09-11
Doll said
Sep 11, 2005
It took me several years to admit that I was a drunk, and then several more to get my ass in AA. Hindsight is 20/20, as the saying goes.
You keep coming back. And get yourself a Big Book , if nothing else, do a little reading. Post your thoughts and feelings here, it helps. We'll respond, as you have seen, with love, experience, compassion and genuine concern for YOU.
You are not alone anymore.........
You're in my thoughts and prayers
Doll
Westchester Rebel said
Sep 11, 2005
Hello again Tipsy,
I just got through posting on your other thread re: rock bottom. Then I read this one. I can identify 100%. The first AA meeting attended, I went at the behest of my then wife. I wasn't ready to stop. I had not hit my bottom. Before leaving that meeting, I shared that I absolutely was in the wrong place. That the people in that room that night were a bunch of whining losers. When I returned to AA 4 years later, I had been beaten down enough by the drink to listen and identify with the feelings in what I was hearing instead of comparing myself with what I was hearing. But I still wasn't 100% ready because after a little over 2-1/2 years of not drinking and going to meetings, I relapsed. This time, (sober since 12/24/03), besides identifying, I have also become much more open-minded and teachable. I have become willing to do whatever it takes to not pick up the next drink. If you really want to stop, the best suggestion I can offer is to try to keep coming with an open mind. If you do that, then even when most of what you hear is whining, you will also hear something you can identify with. Take what you need and leave the rest.
-- Edited by TipsyMcStagger at 18:01, 2005-09-10
-- Edited by TipsyMcStagger at 18:03, 2005-09-10
Good evening Mr McStagger. OK, I can see your view. We are a close group and all of us support each other. Some of the members her are going through some shit at the moment and the rest of us offer support and sympathy.
We have all taken the decision to stop drinking, it's not an easy decision, but it is one that has many benefits.
Stick with us Mc.Stagger, if you can handle being sober, even if you can't at least try to give it a go.
Life will get better for you.
Best wishes.
Chris.
Hey Chris
I agree
try it Mc.stagger If u don't like it u can go back to your misery
Unfortunately, the bottle is but a symptom......... I have no idea how to handle life on life's terms because I drowned all the pain and all the happiness in a bottle of booze for 25 yrs. Learning to live sober and handle situations that most non alkies would intuitively know how to do, is a learning process for me. And it's one I wouldn't miss for the world because you see I'm a grateful, recovering alcoholic..........
We don't feel sorry for ourselves, and we're not looking for pity. Just a little support when the days are long and hard.
.........until you try it, my friend, you have no clue.......
Keep coming back.
Much love to you
Doll
-- Edited by Doll at 20:35, 2005-09-10
-- Edited by Doll at 20:38, 2005-09-10
Welcome to the board. Hope you stick around and get to know us. We all try to help each other here, to get thru the day as best we know how.
"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance--that principle is contempt proir to investigation." Herbert Spencer
Love, cheri
I'm the wife of an alcoholic and I find the posts on this site insightful and uplifting.
Never negative or depressing.
This is a group of kind and caring people who are suffering themselves.
I also think they were just very kind in their responses to your post.
mom to 2
Welcome McStagger. Moody hu? got something right here for that. I call it a hammer.(Smile)
So-our freind? What are yu lookin for. I think youre in a place, where weve all been there and done that.
Some of us still had enough cells left, to get of the garbage truck, before it got all the way to the dump.
Others such as myself, rode it all the way, and still kept kicking tin cans, when I got there.
Are yu kinda having a bit of a battle with step one?
"We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, and that our lives had become unmanagable"?
Everythings a matter of choice my freind. Some of us had to pay a big price to get to AA. Others didnt.
We share our experience, strength, and hope with each other here. We do that with understanding and love.
You want a peice of us buddy? Just hold out your hand halfway, and youll be met with experiences of sobriety you never thought possible.
Now-that doesnt mean that shit doesnt happen in sobriety. It does. But its all a we thing. We kinda hold each other up.
For some of us--some days they hafta use a block and tackle:)--but we get through it all somehow.
No elevators here either, on the way to the top. Gotta use the 12 steps.
Never found love in the bottom of a bottle, even tho I kissed one enough times. Youll find it here.
Hey McStagger, Thanks for your honesty, at least you are feeling something. As , already stated we are a group of recovering alcoholics, all at various stages of recovery, we are learning to live life on lifes terms.
Maybe you are right in a way. I have been posting about a lot of the negitive in my life lately. I had a sponsor once who only gave me 3 to 5 minutes to sit on the pity pot, and then she made me share something positive.
Sooooo, here goes, I'm alive, breathing, have plenty to eat, can afford the price of gasoline, I haven't been in a hurricane,ever...I have a group of AA friends who I can count on anytime, day or night, I have a group of MIP people I can count on,day or night. These people love me in spite of myself, my poor pity me attitude, and they do care if I'm okay .I have now been sober 20 years by the grace of God and a lot of work in the AA program, working the 12 steps, and taking my inventory daily.For all that I'm truly grateful to God and the program.
Only you can decide if you are an alcoholic, do the research, find an AA group, attend at least 6 meetings,and if it doesn't apply to you than, maybe you aren't one of us. There's nothing I love more than to hear that someone is not an Alcoholic, but I love to watch people who are alcoholics get sober one day at a time, to look them in the eye and see the joy,the peace and the understanding of what we have, is all about.
I'm glad you found us. Keep reading and keep posting.
(((Hugs)))
GammyRose
Hey there Tipsy, my newbie friend!
Congratulations on shaking the dust off all of us. I'll bet this one nears an all time high for responses! Definately created a stir, but more importantly, gave us all pause to reflect on why we are here. I'm happy to see that it seems to have really reaffirmed our commitment, for a lot of us, to this group. And, as Gammyrose wrote, it reminded us all that we need to cut back on our personal pity party time.
At the same time, we will still reach out to each other when any one of us is truly having a pure horse s..t day, as people would anywhere, not just in AA.
If you ever have one of those days where you really do feel that there's no use trying anymore, and may as well drink, please tell your feelings to a friend, someone in your AA group, or someone here before you decide to give up. We will be happy to give you a "virtual" slap on the back (or swift kick in the pants, whichever is required to get you back on track), and some encouragement.
I can assure you that there are plenty of "success" stories in AA. They are good to hear, but not enough in the long run. You will also see people come through the AA doorway who fall and fall again. That's why we cannot put the burden of our sobriety on someone else, but have to learn from this program, the steps we can take to attain that goal personally.
I have found in my neck of the woods, that the most successful AA'ers, the ones with years of sobriety, tend to attend meetings less often, because they are busy with their happier, fuller lives.
If you want to hear a couple more success stories in AA, stick around, and in a couple of years, you can tell me your story, and I'll tell you mine.
Peace, Love and prayers to all in our group,
Dan, an alcoholic
-- Edited by TipsyMcStagger at 20:18, 2005-09-11
Hello again Tipsy,
I just got through posting on your other thread re: rock bottom. Then I read this one. I can identify 100%. The first AA meeting attended, I went at the behest of my then wife. I wasn't ready to stop. I had not hit my bottom. Before leaving that meeting, I shared that I absolutely was in the wrong place. That the people in that room that night were a bunch of whining losers. When I returned to AA 4 years later, I had been beaten down enough by the drink to listen and identify with the feelings in what I was hearing instead of comparing myself with what I was hearing. But I still wasn't 100% ready because after a little over 2-1/2 years of not drinking and going to meetings, I relapsed. This time, (sober since 12/24/03), besides identifying, I have also become much more open-minded and teachable. I have become willing to do whatever it takes to not pick up the next drink. If you really want to stop, the best suggestion I can offer is to try to keep coming with an open mind. If you do that, then even when most of what you hear is whining, you will also hear something you can identify with. Take what you need and leave the rest.
Keep coming back,
Rick L.