Don't you see? We do not have to be so victimized by life, by people, by situations, by work, by our friends, by our love relationships, by our family, by our feelings, our thoughts, our circumstances, and ourselves.
We are not victims. We do not have to be victims. That is the whole point!
Yes, admitting and accepting powerlessness is important. But that is the first step, an introduction to this business of recovery. Later, comes owning our power. Changing what we can. This is as important as admitting and accepting powerlessness. And there is so much we can change.
We can own our power, wherever we are, wherever we go, whomever we are with. We do not have to stand there with our hands tied, groveling helplessly, submitting to whatever comes along. There are things we can do. We can speak up. Solve the problem. Use the problem to motivate ourselves to do something good for ourselves.
We can make ourselves feel good. We can walk away. We can come back on our terms. We can stand up for ourselves. We can refuse to let others control and manipulate us.
We can do what we need to do to take care of our selves. That is the beauty, the reward, the crown of victory we are given in this process called recovery. It is what it is all about!
If we can't do anything about the circumstance, we can change our attitude. We can do the work within: courageously face our issues so we are not victimized. We have been given a miraculous key to life.
We are victims no more unless we want to be.
Freedom and joy are ours for the taking, for the feeling, for the hard work we have done.
Today, I will remind myself as often as necessary that I am not a victim, and I do not need to be victimized by whatever comes my way. I will work hard to remove myself as a victim, whether that means setting and enforcing a boundary, walking away, dealing with my feelings, or giving myself what I need. God, help me let go of my need to feel victimized.
Rick said
Jul 26, 2005
GOOD ONE
WHY DO I SOMETIMES LET PEOPLE CONTROL ME?
WHY DO I CARE ABOUT THERE FEELINGS AND MAKE MY SELF NUTS?
GOTTA TELL THEM HOW IT IS AND FEEL GOOD MYSELF
WHY IS IT SO HARD AT TIMES?
THEY DON'T SEEM TO CARE ABOUT MY FEELINGS
WHY DO I CARE ABOUT THERE'S
PEOPLE PLEASING?
OH WELL
GOTTA RUN
HAVE A GOOD DAY ALL
RICK
Phil said
Jul 26, 2005
Yes Rick_I can really identy with yu. As long as everythings going their way, everythings fine.
We stand up for how we feel, or give our opinion on something, or disagree about something- and watch the shit hit the fan. And then its anger and blame us all the way.
Control-nothing but
People pleasing--yup.
I dont need anyone in my life--but there are some that I wish to share my life with.
Without the bullshit.
Relationships are a WE thing all the way--not a me thing.
Have a good day on the ranch Buddy!!
ellen said
Jul 26, 2005
i agree with you both
it's hard to talk sane to an insane person.
it's just as hard to keep ones sanity living like that.
really doesn't matter what you do they'll always be right....just have to let things go and move on.
well thats all i got...
phil- i hear you and i believe things will be alright--hang in there buddy it will all work out.
Phil said
Jul 26, 2005
Hi there Ellen
Things will work out?
No doubts in my mind.
Im in positive mode--ALL THE WAY
Truck on and watch out for the doggy poo.:)
nancyjo59 said
Jul 26, 2005
hello
i am new to your website, i have not had a drink in 3 days and have been looking around the aa sites.
its easy to relate to what all of you are saying
what has drove me to quit drinking are the obvious reasons for an alcholic
the one thing is my attitide towards others around me
the arguments ive been involved in lately are too many to mention
i feel so lonely and isolated i can hardly stand it
i am unfortunatelly homebound at this point in my life
the computer is my connection to other alcholics for now
i attented aa meetings over 2 years ago since i quit going my life has been chaos when it comes to my drinking
just looking for a little communication out there
would love to hear from others who are struggling with alcholism
Owning Our Power
Don't you see? We do not have to be so victimized by life, by people, by situations, by work, by our friends, by our love relationships, by our family, by our feelings, our thoughts, our circumstances, and ourselves.
We are not victims. We do not have to be victims. That is the whole point!
Yes, admitting and accepting powerlessness is important. But that is the first step, an introduction to this business of recovery. Later, comes owning our power. Changing what we can. This is as important as admitting and accepting powerlessness. And there is so much we can change.
We can own our power, wherever we are, wherever we go, whomever we are with. We do not have to stand there with our hands tied, groveling helplessly, submitting to whatever comes along. There are things we can do. We can speak up. Solve the problem. Use the problem to motivate ourselves to do something good for ourselves.
We can make ourselves feel good. We can walk away. We can come back on our terms. We can stand up for ourselves. We can refuse to let others control and manipulate us.
We can do what we need to do to take care of our selves. That is the beauty, the reward, the crown of victory we are given in this process called recovery. It is what it is all about!
If we can't do anything about the circumstance, we can change our attitude. We can do the work within: courageously face our issues so we are not victimized. We have been given a miraculous key to life.
We are victims no more unless we want to be.
Freedom and joy are ours for the taking, for the feeling, for the hard work we have done.
Today, I will remind myself as often as necessary that I am not a victim, and I do not need to be victimized by whatever comes my way. I will work hard to remove myself as a victim, whether that means setting and enforcing a boundary, walking away, dealing with my feelings, or giving myself what I need. God, help me let go of my need to feel victimized.
GOOD ONE
WHY DO I SOMETIMES LET PEOPLE CONTROL ME?
WHY DO I CARE ABOUT THERE FEELINGS AND MAKE MY SELF NUTS?
GOTTA TELL THEM HOW IT IS AND FEEL GOOD MYSELF
WHY IS IT SO HARD AT TIMES?
THEY DON'T SEEM TO CARE ABOUT MY FEELINGS
WHY DO I CARE ABOUT THERE'S
PEOPLE PLEASING?
OH WELL
GOTTA RUN
HAVE A GOOD DAY ALL
RICK
Yes Rick_I can really identy with yu. As long as everythings going their way, everythings fine.
We stand up for how we feel, or give our opinion on something, or disagree about something- and watch the shit hit the fan. And then its anger and blame us all the way.
Control-nothing but
People pleasing--yup.
I dont need anyone in my life--but there are some that I wish to share my life with.
Without the bullshit.
Relationships are a WE thing all the way--not a me thing.
Have a good day on the ranch Buddy!!
i agree with you both
it's hard to talk sane to an insane person.
it's just as hard to keep ones sanity living like that.
really doesn't matter what you do they'll always be right....just have to let things go and move on.
well thats all i got...
phil- i hear you and i believe things will be alright--hang in there buddy it will all work out.
Hi there Ellen
Things will work out?
No doubts in my mind.
Im in positive mode--ALL THE WAY
Truck on and watch out for the doggy poo.:)
i am new to your website, i have not had a drink in 3 days and have been looking around the aa sites.
its easy to relate to what all of you are saying
what has drove me to quit drinking are the obvious reasons for an alcholic
the one thing is my attitide towards others around me
the arguments ive been involved in lately are too many to mention
i feel so lonely and isolated i can hardly stand it
i am unfortunatelly homebound at this point in my life
the computer is my connection to other alcholics for now
i attented aa meetings over 2 years ago since i quit going my life has been chaos when it comes to my drinking
just looking for a little communication out there
would love to hear from others who are struggling with alcholism
nancyjo59