A very elderly gentleman, (mid nineties) very well dressed, hair
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> > well groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel smelling slightly
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> > of a good aftershave, presenting a well looked after image, walks into
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> > an upscale cocktail lounge.
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> > Seated at the bar is an elderly looking lady, (mid eighties). The gentleman
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> > walks over, sits along side of her, orders a drink,
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> > takes a sip, turns to her and says, "So tell me, do I come here often?"
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> > An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of
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> > years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted
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> > for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.
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> > The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the
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> > doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased
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> > that you can hear again."
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> > The gentleman replied, "Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just
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> > sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three
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> > times!"
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> > Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a
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> > bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says . . .
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> > "Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains.
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> > I know you're about my age. How do you feel?"
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> > Slim says, "I feel just like a newborn baby."
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> > "Really!? Like a new-born baby!?"
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> > "Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants."
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> > An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after
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> > eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
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> > The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went
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> > out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it
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> > very highly."
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> > The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?"
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> > The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the
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> > name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... the one
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> > that's red and has thorns." "Do you mean a rose?"
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> > "Yes, that's the one," replied the man. He then turned towards the
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> > kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we
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> > went to last night?"
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