Today's Gift - Nov

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Today's Gift - Nov

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Survival

We will never make it if we feel we are responsible for solving everyone else's problems. It is tempting to our ego to feel that we can exercise control over the lives of those around us, but it is counter to reality. We cannot protect those we love from sadness, sickness, or pain. Making martyrs of ourselves only prepares the ground for future retaliation.

Our primary task is to remember our dependence on our Higher Power and by His grace to maintain our abstinence. The problems, which we face, are best dealt with if our spiritual condition is strong. Without abstinence, we are not much help to anyone, least of all ourselves.

There are times when all we can manage is to hang on, to survive. We know in our heads that these times will eventually pass. Practicing Step Eleven convinces us in our hearts that God is in charge, no matter how far away He may seem to be.

By Your grace, may I survive the hard times.

You are reading from the book:

Food for Thought by Elisabeth L.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Being patient

Over time, we get what we want out of this program. If we seek a better way of life, for example, we will develop it. If we want to diminish our pain, we will find relief. If we want love, we will learn how to give it and receive it.

Over time, our lives can improve a great deal through the Twelve Step program. Thus, our job is to keep coming to meetings and working the Steps.

Can I do what I need to do to get what I want?

Higher Power, help me to be
Patient with myself, the program,
And the process of change.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Be patient with the faults of others; they have to be patient with yours.
--Our Daily Bread

How do we feel when someone we know makes a mistake? What happens when the boss makes an error and we have to work overtime to straighten it out? How do we feel when a cashier overcharges us, the post office loses our package, or the mechanic doesn't fix a problem?

Most of us become angry. Since we have been brought up from childhood to believe we are victims, it seems only natural in adult life to feel the same way. We imagine all those people had it in for us; they were all in league somehow to make us suffer.

But everybody makes mistakes. Who among us is perfect? We have made many mistakes in our lives that have probably brought inconveniences to others. If we can learn to treat the faults of others with patience and understanding instead of anger and resentment, we may find others treating us accordingly.

I can overlook the mistakes of others as I would want them to over look mine.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

I will radiate love and good will to others that I may open a channel for God's love to come to all.
--Paramahansa Yogananda

Our spiritual well-being is hindered whenever we isolate ourselves, whenever we withhold our care and attention from the group or a friend. During these moments, our self-centeredness cuts off our connection to our Higher Power, causing peace to elude us and fear to set in.

The converse is also true. Whenever we selflessly express love and genuine concern for others, we can know the presence of God and can be exhilarated by that knowledge.

In this, we have freedom. No one else controls our thoughts or our decisions to give unconditional love and genuine attention to others. We are in charge. It is up to us to keep the channel to our Higher Power always open, always freely flowing. Our spiritual health is our responsibility and it's an easy one to handle. The only requirement is that we offer love and good will to others.

I will enhance my spiritual health today by focusing my love on the women and men on my path so that I may feel God's presence.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

A crisis is an opportunity to rely on our Higher Power.

When we came to this program, we were told right away that a Higher Power is watching out for us and that we can look to that Power whenever we want guidance or peacefulness. Let's not resist this invitation.

Most of us had daily crises before turning to this program for help. Our attempts to control other people caused many of these crises. So did our reactions to the natural ebb and flow of human existence. Now we have to take the plunge and begin to rely on our God, however we understand God, to show us the way to handle every experience that's part of our Divine unfolding.

I will look to God today, and every experience will make sense in the whole of my existence.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Sobriety is a big gift box with a hundred little packages inside to unwrap.
--Oscar Morris

Sobriety is its own reward and then some. Sobriety is a condition of openness and receptivity to the treasure of life. It is the ability to view the world through gentler glasses and hear our fellows with kinder ears. It is the ability to see things as they really are, instead of how we'd like them to be. It is a condition of honesty and willingness to be true to ourselves and others.

On this day we can look out the window when we get up in the morning. No matter what we see - another building, a yard, even an airshaft - it can remind us that we're not the same people we used to be. We can look at this world without fear. It won't bite back anymore.

Sobriety is seeing the world with open eyes. It is the gift of learning how to view the world as a friendly and loving place to be. Sobriety is crying without shame and laughing with abandon. It is a gift that wakes us up with hope and puts us to sleep with peace.

Today let me cherish my gift of sobriety and not take it for granted.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

The gift of love means this: I want to share with you whatever I have that is good.
--John Powell, S.J.

How loving are we, really? Do we keep score when we do favors for a friend, keeping in mind that we're owed one? Do we hoard rather than share a favorite treat, hoping to prolong our own feast? And the good mood, when it's ours, do we use it to help another raise her spirits or do we secretly gloat because we're "in a better place"?

The opportunity to respond with love visits us throughout each day. A smile, a kind gesture, including someone in a conversation, noticing a job well done, are acts of love, acts that connect our hearts, at least for a moment.

When someone has shared love with us in some form, we notice it and are moved.

You are reading from the book:

Worthy of Love by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Just the Two of Us

Our wedding was beautiful and so were the vows. Till death do us part was our promise. But our child's addiction is like a chainsaw, hacking away at our union-cutting apart a bond meant to last forever. It is destroying the foundation on which our family is built.

In the day-to-day survival-during the prolonged hideousness of this fight-we've lost sight of one other. We've lost sight of what matters. We no longer reach out to each other when we hurt. Instead, like wounded animals, we withdraw, trying to heal ourselves as we sit, alone, in dark corners. We snap and growl at each other like beasts. I don't know what happened to the best friends we used to be.

But it is our child's addiction we need to fight, not each other. So, like folding away the wings of a kite, I will tuck away the tension between us so it can't catch the wind. No matter what happens during the day, I will say I love you when I say goodnight.

May we shine with love, kindness, and encouragement toward ourselves and each other every day.
Lynn Dailey

You are reading from the book:

Tending Dandelions by Sandra Swenson

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Nothing is more difficult than competing with a myth.
--Francoise Giroud

Sometimes we think we need to try and be something we're not. Maybe we feel pressure from friends to behave or dress like someone else.

All we need to do is remember when we were younger and dressed in our parents' clothes and shoes. We pretended to be grownups, and it was fun for a while. Then the huge shoes on our feet grew clumsy and uncomfortable and the mountain of rolled-up sleeves kept falling down and getting in the way. Soon we grew tired of the game and stopped pretending.

Today when we start feeling the pressure to be someone else, let's remember how hard it is to play a role that doesn't fit us.

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

You Give Me Strength

Lord God, thank You for loving me
Even when I turn away from You.
I am grateful for Your constant care and concern.
Though I feel unworthy of Your great love,
I thank You that through my weakness
You give me strength,
And in my wandering You show me the way.
--Author unknown

You are reading from the book:

The 12 Step Prayer Book Volume 2 by Bill P. and Lisa D.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Do not be afraid of the ego. It depends on your mind, and as you made it by believing in it, so you can dispel it by withdrawing belief from it.
--A Course in Miracles

Some of us are fond of saying "the devil made me do it" when we've done something we're not too proud of. We might as well say "the ego made me do it" because the ego is our own personal "devil."

Sometimes we like to claim that we weren't in complete control of our actions, that we were overcome by an irresistible urge. We can't, however, say that with a clear conscience. At one time in our addictive past, maybe, but not now. Now, we can be responsible. An urge can overcome us only to the extent that we let it - only as we give it the power of believing in it.

We have a choice. We can listen to the voice of our ego or the voice of God. How can we tell the difference? By how we feel. The ego's urgings always leave us with some misgivings. God's guidance assures us.

I choose to listen to the voice of assurance.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

With Laughter

O God, as the day returns and brings us the silly
Rounds of irritating duties, help me perform
Them with laughter and a kind face.
Let cheerfulness overflow in my work;
Give me joy during my business all this day;
Bring me to my resting bed tired and content
And grant me the gift of sleep.

--Adapted from writing by Robert Louis Stevenson

You are reading from the book:

The 12 Step Prayer Book Volume 2 by Bill P. and Lisa D.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken.
--Samuel Johnson

The Twelve Steps won't work for anyone unless they are practiced. That's why so many veterans of this program work the Steps over and over. It's a good habit, and good habits - just like bad ones - strengthen with use and time.

Prayer is an important part of this program that becomes as regular as habit, and it's a habit worth getting into. Communing with God at a similar time, or times, every day brings us power for daily living and provides us with a spiritual reserve. Daily contact with our Higher Power gives us special insights into our own actions and helps us look with love on those around us.

Today I will strive to make prayer a habit.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Reflection for the Day

Every man and woman who has joined The Program and intends to stick around has, without realizing it, made a beginning on Step Three. Isn't it true that, in all matters related to their addictions, each of them has decided to turn his or her life over to the care, protection, and guidance of The Program? So already a willingness has been achieved to cast out one's own will and one's own ideas about the addiction in favor of those suggested by The Program. If this isn't turning one's will and life over to a new-found "Providence," then what is it? Have I had a spiritual awakening as the result of The Steps?

Today I Pray

For myself, I pray for a God-centered life. I thank God often for the spiritual awakening I have felt since I turned my life over. May the words "spiritual awakening" be a clue to others that there is a free fund of spiritual power within each person. It must only be discovered.

Today I Will Remember

I will try to be God-centered.

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

An alcoholic spends his life committing suicide on the installment plan.
--Laurence Peter

None of us woke up one morning and found we had suddenly turned into an addict. We got to be one by practice. And we practiced often. We ignored our families - we left work early - and went drinking and drugging. Daily, we chose chemicals over anything else.

Likewise, getting sober is no accident. We use the Steps. We work the program. At meetings, we're reminded to help others. We all get sober on the installment plan. A day at a time. We got sick one day at a time; we recover one day at a time.

Prayer for the Day

Today, with my Higher Power's help, I'll be happier, more honest, more sober. Sobriety is like a good savings account. Higher Power, help me to put in more than I take out.

Action for the Day

I'll go over my Step One to remind myself it's no accident I'm an addict.

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Reflection for the Day

I must never forget who and what I am and where I come from. I have to remember the nature of my illness and what it was like before I came to The Program. I'll try to keep the memory green, yet not spend my time dwelling morbidly on the past. I won't be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to others, so others will give to me. Can I ever afford to forget what it used to be like, even for one minute?

Today I Pray

May I never forget the painful days of my addiction. May I never forget that the same misery awaits me if I should slip back into the old patterns. At the same time, may such backward glances serve only to bolster my own present strength and the strength of others like me. Please, God, do not let me dredge up these recollections in order to outdo or "out drunk" my fellow members. Like others who are chemically dependent, I must be wary of my desire to be center stage in the spotlight.

Today I Will Remember

I do more when I don't 'outdo.'

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Newcomer

You've told me I should pray for someone who's been causing me all sorts of problems. But that's not going to change that person, is it?

Sponsor

I've heard various descriptions of how prayer works. Some say God listens, some say our thoughts affect the energy of the universe and create change; some say that we're conditioning ourselves to transform our own attitudes, and that attitudes, good and bad, are contagious. It's a mystery but it does work.

Someone I worked with seemed so disrespectful and unpleasant that I dreaded encounters with her. I began saying a daily prayer for her health and complete happiness. Before gatherings that included her, I prayed that communication between us would be easy and smooth and that each person's highest good in that situation would be realized. The effects were dramatic. I experienced relief from my fear of facing her and began to see her as a whole human being. I genuinely began to want her well-being. For whatever reason, she stopped turning her back on me and sometimes actually smiled.

I'm not suggesting that we try to manipulate others to behave as we wish. Specific results and timetables aren't in our hands. But I do know that our prayers are always effective in furthering our own and others' processes of healing.

Today, I pray for others, placing them in my Higher Power's hands.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Differences

. . . with no hidden cutting edge.

The respect and dignity a couple show each other set the table from which they are nourished for all other activities in their lives. Any feeling can be expressed in respectful or disrespectful ways. Anger is one of the most difficult to express respectfully. Everyone feels frustrated and angry at times. The crucial thing to learn is how to be angry and still be respectful - how to deal with our impatience without blame or put-downs. Many of us have to learn how to love without being possessive, how to be playful in a lighthearted way with no hidden cutting edge. When we treat our partner with disrespect, we pour poison into our own well. It may feel satisfying at first, but the long-term consequences are not good to live with.

When we are committed to respect in our relationship, we continue to learn at even deeper levels what respect truly means. We find that simply listening to each other - and letting in our differences - is a form of respect that nourishes us.

Name a difference between you and someone close to you that you respect.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Coping with Families

There are many paths to self-care with families. Some people choose to sever connections with family members for a period of time. Some people choose to stay connected with family members and learn different behaviors. Some disconnect for a time, and then return slowly on a different basis.

There is no one or perfect way to deal with members of our family in recovery. It is up to each of us to choose a path that suits us and our needs at each point in time.

The idea that is new to us in recovery is that we can choose. We can set the boundaries we need to set with family members. We can choose a path that works for us, without guilt and obligation or undue influence from any source, including recovery professionals. Our goal is to be able to take care of ourselves, love ourselves, and live healthy lives despite what family members do or don't do. We decide what boundaries or decisions are necessary to do this.

God, help me choose the path that is right for me with family. Help me understand there is no right or wrong in this process. Help me strive for forgiveness and learn to detach with love, whenever possible. I understand that this never implies that I have to forfeit self-care and health for the good of the system.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

I came to understand that it was all right to do things for people as long as I did it for the sake of doing it... the value being more in the act than in the result.
--Joanna Field

We've all heard the sentiment that it is better to give than to receive. Yet we may find it difficult to give to others, whether that giving involves an actual gift or an act of giving of ourselves: caring for someone who is ill, running an errand for someone, giving a backrub, or extending an invitation to someone who is alone.

We may feel afraid to do for others without any expectations of receiving something in return. To give unselfishly exposes our feelings and shows we care. Yet if we can look beyond our fears to the selflessness of our giving actions, there is a great reward -- knowing we had the courage to risk giving to someone.

The risks we take in giving to others are lessons for ourselves as well as for those whose lives we touch.

The gift of giving opens doors to the homes of our souls.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

The expression of praise as thanksgiving, gratitude, and joy is among the most powerful forms of affirmation.
--Catherine Ponder

Praise inevitably has a multiple effect. It positively acknowledges another human being, enhancing his or her well being, while making us feel good. This offering of love, which is the substance of praise, heals all who share in its circle.

We can see the effects of affirmation in the people we admire. We can discern its absence too, particularly among those who struggle. How difficult is it to give small acknowledgments to those we care about? Making a habit of this heals our own inner wounds too.

Affirming a friend or ourselves connects us to the spirit residing within. That bond fills in our empty spaces, making us whole and healed. Our security grows as we praise one another.

I will freely offer my love in the form of praise to the wonderful friends on my path today.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Burden No Longer

Lord, take away this ache in my heart.

I know I have asked this of You before. This ache consumes my every waking moment, haunts my dreams, and weakens my spirit. I pray You take this from me so the burden is no longer my own, but ours together. I have wasted enough energy and am ready to turn it over to You completely.

I believe in You and Your will for me.

You are reading from the book:

The 12 Step Prayer Book Volume 2 by Bill P. and Lisa D.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Stolen from Me

My child has been stolen from me. He's even been stolen from himself-The Addict has whisked away my son's very essence. I don't know if I will ever get him back. I know what he's like, the monstrous fiend who took my son away. The Abductor is evil, heartless, selfish, and abusive, with a reputation for spreading anarchy, bondage, devastation, and death.

Thinking about the torture my child must endure each and every minute of every day, with every passing year, is torture for me. I try not to allow the images to fill my mind (because they kill me)-but they do. Because they slip right on in with the thoughts of my child that fill my mind each and every minute of every day, with every passing year, too.

The Abductor needs my child, my child's body, to survive and will fight to keep him all the way to the bitter end. There is no ransom I can pay. There's no SWAT team on the job. No yellow ribbon tied around a tree.

My child has been stolen from me. There is no end to this hell.

Imagine trying to live without air. Now imagine something worse.
Amy Reed

You are reading from the book:

Tending Dandelions by Sandra Swenson

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

A controller doesn't trust his/her ability to live through the pain and chaos of life. There is no life without pain just as there is no art without submitting to chaos.
--Rita Mae Brown

It is very hard for most of us to see how controlling we are. We may feel uptight or careful, but we haven't seen it as controlling ourselves or controlling how people respond to us. We may be worried about a loved one's behavior or safety, but not realize our hovering over that person is a controlling activity. We may be keenly aware of other people's controlling behavior with us, but unaware we have equaled their control by monitoring them and trying to change their behavior.

What a moment of spiritual adventure it is to risk living through the pain! When we do not seek an escape or a quick fix but have patience with the process, new possibilities often do develop. We can only let go of our control - or turn it over to our Higher Power. And we will do it and forget, taking control back within minutes or within an hour. Then we let go again.

Today, I will submit to the insecurity of a changing universe and have faith that I can live through the process and grow.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

MaybeIAm · Member

ironically i had just been sitting here wondering how i will ever get through the pain and chaos of life .. translation how can i control it all .. honestly .. i really am not sure i am able to let go of all (ego) i need and surrender .. not sure how to cut off the voice (or my attention from it) .. i suppose i need to 'shift my focus to the fellowship .. thanks for posting these pieces of encouragement ..

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

By shifting your focus to the 'fellowship' you will make 'lifelong friends' that will always stand beside you and be there for you when you don't know which way to turn ... this 'fellowship' becomes 'family' ... those are the ones that truly want to help in times of need ... they(we) truly have been through what you're go'n through ... and we do not expect anything in return ...

Love ya and God Bless,

Pappy

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

There are as many ways to live and grow, as there are people. Our own ways are the only ways that should matter to us.
--Evelyn Mandel

Wanting to control other people, to make them live as we'd have them live, makes the attainment of serenity impossible. And serenity is the goal we are seeking in this recovery program, in this life.

We are each powerless over others, which relieves us of a great burden. Controlling our own behavior is a big enough job. Learning to behave responsibly takes practice. Most of us in this recovery program have behaved irresponsibly for much of our lives. Emotional immaturity is slow to depart, but every responsible action we take gives us the courage for another - and then another. Our own fulfillment is the by-product of the accumulation of our own responsible actions. Others' actions need not concern us.

Today, I will weigh my behavior carefully. Responsible behavior builds gladness of heart.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Reflection for the Day

I'll begin today with prayer - prayer in my heart, prayer in my mind, and words of prayer on my lips. Through prayer, I'll stay tuned to God today, reaching forward to become that to which I aspire. Prayer will redirect my mind, helping me rise in consciousness to the point where I realize that there's no separation between God and me. As I let the power of God flow through me, all limitations will fall away. Do I know that nothing can overcome the power of God?

Today I Pray

Today may I offer to my Higher Power a constant prayer, not just a "once-in-the-morning-does-it" kind. May I think of my Higher Power at coffee breaks, lunch, tea time, during a quiet evening - and at all times in between. May my consciousness expand and erase the lines of separation so that the Power is a part of me and I am a part of the Power.

Today I Will Remember

To live an all-day prayer.

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

Do I trigger gossip?

There is a saying that listening to gossip is gossip. How true! If there were no listeners, there would never be any gossip.

Some of us who pride ourselves in refraining from gossip may still have a problem with it. It's possible we still keep ears open for any juicy gossip that could fall our way. We might also shake the tree if we believe another person has some gossip to share with us. This is done in seemingly innocent ways, sometimes just by mentioning the name of a person to another who may have strong opinions to express.

The harm of gossip lies in what we do to ourselves when we engage in it. There is no way we can continue to have spiritual growth if we practice gossip, even as passive listeners. Spiritual growth takes place within us, and it needs an environment completely free of any ill will.

Let's beware of any tendency to say things that induce others to gossip. At the same time, let's tune out gossip that seems to occur spontaneously. Gossip is the enemy of the growth we desire.

It is a real relief to know that today I have no desire to spread gossip or listen to it. This includes things I might read in magazines or newspapers.

You are reading from the book:

Walk in Dry Places by Mel B.

Pythonpappy · MIP Old Timer

A terrace nine stories high begins with a pile of earth.
--Lao-tzu

Imagine yourself with a pile of dirt in front of you and building plans for a one-story structure. It would be easy to think, "Oh, this is impossible - it will never get done."

But the architect hires people to help. A foundation is built, and then the frame. From there, step by step, the rest is filled in. We have all watched a building take shape and become a finished product.

Building plans are like the goals we all have. We want to be a better person or friend, a better artist or athlete. Reaching a goal is like putting up a building. Once we have a goal, we need a strong foundation to support us. All of us need the help of others to reach our goals.

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous