In the area that I first attended AA in, newcomers did not share in meetings until they had a year sober. This was back in the seventies. This is not to say that more experienced members didn't listen to the newcomer before and after meetings - just that they did not share during meetings. The reason for this, as it was explained to me, was that our job when sharing was to share our experience, strength and hope - to share on what it was like, what happened and what it was like now. As newcomers, our stories hadn't gotten to the point where we had enough of 'what it was like now' to share.
Recently on this forum, we've had some difficult discussions regarding the content of shares. Some saying that we should share the solution as it comes from the Big Book - chapter and verse as it were. Others suggesting that we should make it more personal. In searching for an answer to this almost always divisive issue, I turned to the back of the Big Book - to the stories. My first edition Big Book is long gone and frankly, I'm not prepared to, nor do I have the strength to go through each story in each edition, but...
I can't recall a single share in the back of the book that ever quoted the first 164 pages. Is my memory faulty or did they not?
There have been new stories added to every edition of the Big Book. Approximately seventy-five stories were available for consideration for the first edition. Approximately two million stories were available for the fourth edition. Of those two million, I believe that every one of them had access to the first 164 pages of the Big Book.
I am not directing this question to you specifically Stepchild. I do know that there is nothing that I can say that will ever change your mind. I am not trying to.
Certainly you are familiar with the saying, "There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorancethat principle is contempt prior to investigation."
I look at the stories in the back like I look at speaker meetings Angell....There is a time and a place to share how it was...What happened and what it is like now. I also look at shares like you hear in Big Book and Step meetings a little differently...Because at some point you have to share how you got there. I like Big Book and step meetings...For myself..That is where I see recovery happening.....And no.....I don't think you will change my mind on that. Those stories and speaker meetings offer hope....Big Book and step meetings offer directions.
There is more to recovery than the first 164 pages of the big book. Most of us know that.The quality of the board has diminished from the hyper focus on just that. I have noticed very diminished posting because of the divisiveness of the arguments. I personally am not even inclined to share much on the board about my personal life now because I feel like the emphasis amongst some is more on that than on actual recovering people and what our lives are like in recovery. It actually saddens me.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
And I do agree that those first 164 pages offer directions...but directions without hope and inspiration and a human side are what? Basically lectures that come across like you haven't read the actual book or are stupid and didn't understand it and that is why you need it spouted to you "precisely" over and over. I discussed this with my sponsor and he asked if these folks were trying to drive people away. I responded that I believed their intent was the opposite. I understand some may like using that 1 section of the big book as a bible and then spouting it in all shares religiously. To me, that's religion pretty much in a nutshell. Don't think the founders wanted that.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
I feel the same. And at the same time - I feel like this an opportunity... practice at allowing ourselves to be true to ourselves despite the dysfunction that goes on around us. The epitome of living a peaceful life even with someone who is still drinking (or dry drunk). I never could quite imagine how that could truly be possible. But I did find the fear I had under it... eventually. I just have not put the faith into action *yet*.
I have not stepped up at all. I have in fact, cowered away from the opportunity... masking it under 'detach with love' LOLOL. I am so tricky and manipulative with myself that I believe myself about stuff using RECOVERY slogans against me! Rolling on the floor LOLOLOLOLOL oh dear *tear
So. There is no reason I can not just *be* First it was Tipsy... yes... I LET it in. Now this. Well not anymore. I surrender my will. My life to the care of a higher power that I do not understand and has NEVER failed me. xoxoxxoo Thanks for bringing this up Angell - love to all.
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Thanks for everything. Peace and Love on your journey.
Yeah...thanks Tash. Old Mark would be posting even more, arguing, and trying to "fix" this and also pulling the moderator card probably. Currently, I'm just having to seek better recovery elsewhere. Still monitoring for spam and outright chaos...I figure that's my service here. I only go into the ring like 10 percent of the time instead of 100 lol.
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Keep coming back. It works if you work it. So work it. You're worth it!
I'll gracefully bow out of here PC....I disagree with half the crap I hear on this board anyway. You guys can share how great your lives are...And I'll continue to share what I share in meetings. Like I said...I prefer meetings that talk about recovery...That's why I go to them. You can guys can carry on and talk about whatever the hell you want. I'm not going to argue about the program that's in the book....You have a better way to do it....Have at it.
