no names, you can call me docdeangelo. as you may have guessed i am a physician. emergency medicine to be precise. i may be young. i may have a drinking problem. But i did work very hard for very many years to be named dr.
i've been drinking on and off since i was 14. mostly on but i have had bouts of sobriety, sometimes lasting months.
the odd thing, i'm a functional drunk. fully funtional. i slur words slightly but other than that the general population has no idea about my inebriation, and thats the way that i like it. but my bodily function deteriorates rapidly once i hit shitfaced stage, whose doesn't?
sorry i tend to go on tangents when i've been drinking. i've been drinking since 14, i'm now 31 and i'm worried that my demons are catching up with me.
honestly what worries me is that i have a physical feeling of terror when i imagine tomorrow without my bottle. i feel as if i can manage the drink, but giving it up may be the most difficult thing i ever try.
sorry guys ive been on other forums before but this isn't my car or my watch, this is my life; which i'm beginning to realize that i think about my own life less than i think about my cars or my watches, kinda sad
i've never done a self-help post and dont know how to write about myself, hope you'll excuse me and help me along
Have you ever tried Alcoholics Anonymous meetings and do you have any experience with AA's twelve steps?
Or have you ever tried any other method of quitting drinking and staying sober (other than simply 'white knuckling it' and relying on personal willpower)?
-- Edited by davep12and12 on Thursday 31st of July 2014 09:24:57 PM
i've been to meetings, i've driven countless friends to them but i never paid attention really...
and i just googled the 12 steps. of course i'd heard of them but i have no experience with that. i have a problem with step #2 as i don't believe in a "higher power" or anything like that. I need a AAA program, alcoholics and atheists anonymous. i've even refered patients to AA programs but i hadn't realized that it was a program that was so dependent on spirituality. i will no longer be referring patients to AA. now i know...
Hello Doc, welcome to the board, we're all family in here. Welcome to all the newcomers, most I've seen at one time, you'll all are amazing.
Stick around and help each other stay sober, that's how it works.
Doc, you don't need to believe in God or any other deity to belong to AA or work the steps. A "higher power" can be anything at all, from your dog to the ocean, just not you.
Doc, you don't need to believe in God or any other deity to belong to AA or work the steps. A "higher power" can be anything at all, from your dog to the ocean, just not you.
thank you!
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Worthy christians know all things our possible thru God.
Welcome to the site Doc. I didn't know squat about alcoholism when I came to AA. I just knew my ass was kicked. I learned a lot in this book. Alcoholics Anonymous...Also known as the Big Book.
This is from the Foreward...
To show other alcoholics PRECISELY HOW WE HAVE RECOVERED is the main purpose of this book.
I'd suggest reading The Doctor's opinion and the first 3 chapters to start. If you can relate to it....Carry on. If not....You probably don't need it. I'm glad you are here.
Yes, that whole 'God thing' can make it seem like it's just not for people who don't have religious beliefs. But it turns out that this isn't true. The 'higher power' term can mean a whole lot of things, and it certainly doesn't have to mean some kind of omnipotent all-knowing supernatural being. There are plenty of atheists and agnostics in AA who have been sober for a long time. They found a way to apply the 12 steps in a way that was meaningful to them.
For the purposes of AA and getting sober, this whole "God" or Higher Power" concept can be many things, including just a simple set of basic, readily observable principles. Things like Honesty, Openmindedness, Willingness, etc. Some people call these 'spiritual principles' but they still exist even if you don't believe that an omnipotent entity created them. And - here's the point - they can be a POWER that is GREATER than the messed up alcoholic thinking that goes on in our heads and repeatedly convinces us to engage in destructive behavior like drinking.
The point is that we need to get skilled at recognizing our own alcoholic thought processes, and then find SOMETHING - ANYTHING - within us our outside us, that is saner and healthier than that stuff, and develop the habit of relying on this new resource to guide us in our actions.
The whole 'higher power' thing seemed like a deal breaker when I first checked out AA, but I found that the hoop I needed to jump through was way bigger than I thought it was and I didn't have to talk myself into faking some religious belief that I really didn't believe or anything like that. I found a way to get sober and stay sober by applying AA's 12 steps in my life and I've been sober now for many years.
Of course, AA isn't the only way to get sober, but it's by far the best option for success so it's prudent to really give it a thorough consideration before discarding it as an option.
I totally understand what you're saying Dave P. Makes complete sense in my mind, I already live by my own set of principles, and am a good person by my own initiative. I understand what you're saying, and it is along the lines of what I was thinking of doing, to only utilize the aspects of the steps that I agree with or can see value in.
Today I got to work early and I was still drunk from last night. i had one of the nurses start an IV on me and i ran it through my shirt into a backpack with IV bags, multivitamins, and Phenergan for the nausea; a pressure bag and a timed drip and in a little bit i'm feeling right as rain!! I didn't allow myself to see any serious cases while I wasn't feeling well, and i was feeling better very soon with all those fluids running into me!
Honestly guys, stay hydrated. The majority of people that i see on a daily basis are chronically dehydrated.
I totally understand what you're saying Dave P. Makes complete sense in my mind, I already live by my own set of principles, and am a good person by my own initiative. I understand what you're saying, and it is along the lines of what I was thinking of doing, to only utilize the aspects of the steps that I agree with or can see value in.
Today I got to work early and I was still drunk from last night. i had one of the nurses start an IV on me and i ran it through my shirt into a backpack with IV bags, multivitamins, and Phenergan for the nausea; a pressure bag and a timed drip and in a little bit i'm feeling right as rain!! I didn't allow myself to see any serious cases while I wasn't feeling well, and i was feeling better very soon with all those fluids running into me!
Honestly guys, stay hydrated. The majority of people that i see on a daily basis are chronically dehydrated.Its cause they drinking all the time man! You gotta just say fuck those guys. and be normal because if you get sober people are gonna start treating you different. they're gonna start spending more money.s
Well there ya go, Doc. As long as you can maintain just a bit of an open mind and don't let your own head talk you out of getting sober because of stuff like this, AA can work for you.
I encourage you to get a copy of the AA "Big Book". Since you are a doctor, there are a few sections in there that might really resonate with you.
- In the front of the book, the section called "The Doctor's Opinion".
In the back of the book there is a collection of short personal stories of AA members, and a few of them are doctors. In fact, AA's second member was a doctor - "Doctor Bob".
- There 's a story called 'Physician, heal thyself".
- And a story that I think really says a lot, which is called "Doctor Alcoholic Addict" if you are reading the 3rd edition of the book, and the same story has a different title if you are reading the 4th edition of the book, where it is called "Acceptance was the Answer".
Well there ya go, Doc. As long as you can maintain just a bit of an open mind and don't let your own head talk you out of getting sober because of stuff like this, AA can work for you.
I encourage you to get a copy of the AA "Big Book". Since you are a doctor, there are a few sections in there that might really resonate with you.
- In the front of the book, the section called "The Doctor's Opinion".
In the back of the book there is a collection of short personal stories of AA members, and a few of them are doctors. In fact, AA's second member was a doctor - "Doctor Bob".
- There 's a story called 'Physician, heal thyself".
- And a story that I think really says a lot, which is called "Doctor Alcoholic Addict" if you are reading the 3rd edition of the book, and the same story has a different title if you are reading the 4th edition of the book, where it is called "Acceptance was the the worst way to go. I got you man. I'm drunk like you . I heard they don't like to hear about fags or any kinda drugs things......Answer".
Did you know one of the founders of our program was a doctor? Just a little history tidbit.
You know, if you put just some of the effort you spend drinking into staying sober, you're gonna have a great sober life! One of the cardinal symptoms of this illness is denial. You may have seen this in some of your patients.
And I gotta ask, is starting an IV and pressure infusing it, taking medications, popping vitamins at work, and shifting your patient load, something a normal social drinker would do?
I've never seen anybody too dumb for the program, but we have had some that were too smart. Unfortunately many of those guys and gals wind up on the obituary page, sooner rather than later. Truth.
Doc, don't worry about the God thing. But no bullshit, this is a spiritual program. But you get to pick the spirit!
Go to some meetings, see if you can identify. Try it for six weeks. If you don't think it's for you, we'll gladly refund your misery.
I say all this with great hopes that you'll be successful and we'll see you around regularly on these boards.
Welcome to MIP DocD, ... ... ... I was told that if you think you have a problem with alcohol, you probably do ... ... ...
I really relate to your post ... I was a good 'working alcoholic' for many years ... but I never got better, only worse ... I did installation and service on MRI's, CT's, Cath Lab's, R & F X-ray machines, and many other medical imaging devices ... I was on 24 hour call for emergency repairs and frequently told the Techs, I've had a couple drinks, do you still want me to come out ... they always said we need you, get here ASAP ...
Great income ... big head, alcohol started calling all the shots ... asked a tech one time to take a chest X-ray on me ... the Dr. said I had an enlarged heart, he asked 'do you drink?' ... I said 3 or 4 a day(a lie ... it was more like 12 to 15)(at that time) ... he said to not drink more than 2 a day ... I thought, why even drink then ... 2 would be just plain torture ...
Okay, fast forward 20 years ... in my 50's ... can't hold a job ... blew about $600k to 800k of retirement money ... nearly died ... rehab showed I was .38 on their breath thingy ... couldn't walk unassisted for 3 days ... finally got the message that AA was my last hope ... sober 6 1/2 years @ 61 y/o ...
My biggest problem coming into AA ??? ... Thought I was too smart for these losers ... well, ... guess what ??? ... they were the smart ones ... I was an idiot ... hope you do not follow my path ... hope you come here with an 'open mind' ... (the mind is like a parachute, ... it doesn't work unless its open) ...
Take Care, Pappy
P.S. ... The spirituality I found in this program is the BEST thing to ever happen to me ... I became a changed person with it ... (for the better, in case you're wondering!)(oh, that wasn't my first rehab either ...)
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'Those who leave everything in God's hand will eventually see God's hand in everything.'