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Post Info TOPIC: My Drinking Dream


MIP Old Timer

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My Drinking Dream
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I had what I considered to be a nightmare last night. I started to post about it this a.m. and I just didn't want to even think about it. In the dream, I was with an old drinking friend of mine. We used to drink together in wine glasses larger than any I had ever seen before. I felt less guilty using those glasses because I could drink twice as much and still say to myself that I only had two glasses to drink. Anyway, in my dream I was at her house and there were other people there and we were admiring all of my friend's spices. Then people started drinking and carrying on and I completely forgot about my sobriety and I was drinking along with them. Then it dawned on me that I was drinking and I had been sober for almost a year and I had just ruined my sobriety by drinking again. I felt so depressed and was so disappointed that I not only let myself down, I let my family and friends as well as people in AA down. In the dream I was actually trying to figure out how I could go back into the meetings again. I knew that if I didn't I had just signed my death sentence and I told myself that I would just have to go back and not worry what anyone else thought.

At first, I thought this was one of the worst dreams that I can remember having. Then I thought about it a while ago and realized that maybe it wasn't that bad after all and maybe it is a message that I need to be extra cautious and not get too confident in myself that I've "got this". The dream was so realistic and the feelings and emotions I had were ones which I know I would actually experience if I were to start drinking again. 

BTY



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MIP Old Timer

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...and I didn't get what the "spices" were all about at all however I did  look up "spice and alcohol" just in case there was anything to this, and found this:


"Spice-Lovers More Likely to Have Alcohol Problems"
http://www.smh.com.au/national/spicelovers-more-likely-to-have-alcohol-problems-20130205-2dvz2.html

(Very interesting as I have always loved spicy foods, as my dad did.)



-- Edited by betterthanyesterday52 on Sunday 13th of April 2014 07:49:41 PM

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Sometimes in my dreams I drink and carouse . Then I try to find ways to cover it up.

Finally I wake up and realize it was a dream .... how good not to have to confess something I only dreamt about.wink

 

We all have those dreams, they do appear less often over the years.

 

All the best.

 

Bob R



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MIP Old Timer

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My last drinking dream or the last one I had came after 26 years of sobriety...lol...some of those memories come bubbling up to the surface after detaching themselves from the bottom of the swamp.   I jumped out of bed and was standing up besides it with my wife looking up at me in the dark.  "What's wrong"? she asked and I asked, "Did I leave the house"?  she said "No" and I said "Are you sure"?...."You have never left this bed tonight".  The dream was a recurrence of a drinking event I had had decades before when married to my first wife...this wife is number three.    Swamp gas...   Dreams for me are metaphoric what we see in the dream that we remember clearly usually has some association and then not always scarey or negative....Just a dream.  

I was once told after a meeting that when I had a drinking "dream" to enjoy it because it was a freebie.   LOL  Sponsors can be funny.  smile



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MIP Old Timer

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Some say dreams are a rehearsal for life. You can get it wrong in a dream and no one dies. I still have drinkdreams but now there's usually an emotional reason. I take them as warnings....to remind myself of the path I was on and where it leads.

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MIP Old Timer

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You also told yourself in the dream that you would keep coming back now matter what. It already shows how willing you are. I had those types of dreams too - not ones where I got drunk, but ones where I either already drank or drank absent mindedly and then was all shameful and worried. I think it has to do with gaining a sober identity and a place in AA and a fear of losing it. But also it's not necessarily a bad thing because it does show how much you value your sobriety (by your reaction in the dream and after).

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MIP Old Timer

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My opinion only:  I've found that dreams are only one of the many ways that God reaches out to us to speak to us, or send us a message.  I've had vague dreams that didn't seem to mean anything, but I've also had very vivid and clear dreams that most definitely did mean something important that I need to pay attention to.  I can tell which is which by the message it leaves me with.

Mike D.



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MIP Old Timer

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Thanks for the great responses, folks, and I felt a connect to every one....


Jerry--loved the "I was once told after a meeting that when I had a drinking "dream" to enjoy it because it was a freebie" quotation!

Bob wrote--" ....Then I try to find ways to cover it up"--I can admit this now...I was thinking in my dream if I could get away with going in to meetings and acting like I hadn't drank and then thinking I couldn't lie to myself and to others like that. It is good to know that I had a conscious.

Bill said..."I take them as warnings....to remind myself of the path I was on and where it leads."
I wondered if it was a warning not to get too comfortable and be on my toes.


Pinkchip said... "I had those types of dreams too - not ones where I got drunk, but ones where I either already drank or drank absent mindedly and then was all shameful and worried. I think it has to do with gaining a sober identity and a place in AA and a fear of losing it. But also it's not necessarily a bad thing because it does show how much you value your sobriety (by your reaction in the dream and after).".....I too was absent minded in my dream until after I downed about 2 drinks and felt shame and worry. I like what you said about the "sober identity" and fear of losing it. I do value my sobriety. I have placed so much emphasis on getting those chips (which like I said, I go to one meeting which gives out monthly chips.) and after I reach a year, no more chips for me until I get my second year. I know now what some of the posters on here have shared about not placing too much importance on them. I think I was using those as an extra incentive to stay sober. I actually went out and bought me a box of poker chips to give myself for each month after a year....I don't know if that is a good or bad thing for me to do and welcome input on that.

Mike D wrote.... "I've found that dreams are only one of the many ways that God reaches out to us to speak to us, or send us a message"  I wondered if it was a message from God as I do think like you said you do about some dreams being just that and this one was very vivid and clear and for me to remember the emotions I felt and them to be so close to what I know I would actually feel was very eery at first, then calming to me for some reason.


Now, can someone please explain why the only cut and paste I did which turned out so "big" is Mike's and was the one about God....it's kind of freaking me out. I didn't change that font size.(Darn, I just found out that Mike D.'s font was bigger and that's why it did it....and I was hoping that was another message from God.)

BTY



-- Edited by betterthanyesterday52 on Monday 14th of April 2014 08:11:42 AM



-- Edited by betterthanyesterday52 on Monday 14th of April 2014 08:18:59 AM

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MIP Old Timer

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Congratulations BTY, ... in my tiny brain, this dream tells me that you have finally let your 'subconscious' absorb some AA thinking ... the guilt when you realize you broke your sobriety in your dream tells me that in your most basic thoughts, hidden from view, are changing ... to me, this is quite evident in this type dream ...

To me, it's a giant leap forward ... imagine, to wake up knowing it was only a dream, no hung out feeling of a hang-over ... no additional amends to make ... no loss of memory of the night or day before ... just a RENEWED dedication to continue progress in the AA way of life ...

Great post ... thanks ... I needed this ...



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MIP Old Timer

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betterthanyesterday52 wrote:

Thanks for the great responses, folks, and I felt a connect to every one....




Now, can someone please explain why the only cut and paste I did which turned out so "big" is Mike's and was the one about God....it's kind of freaking me out. I didn't change that font size.(Darn, I just found out that Mike D.'s font was bigger and that's why it did it....and I was hoping that was another message from God.)

BTY



-- Edited by betterthanyesterday52 on Monday 14th of April 2014 08:11:42 AM



-- Edited by betterthanyesterday52 on Monday 14th of April 2014 08:18:59 AM


 Don't over-analyze it, ... In my mind, I think perhaps it WAS the Man upstairs making a point again, as He often does in 'subtle' ways ... you and I are just learning to 'see' through a new pair of glasses, the new world to behold ...



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MIP Old Timer

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Oh man, my dog Rose is laying on the Love-seat asleep and dreaming right now ... ... ... she barks when she dreams, LOL ... and sometimes she gets her legs go'n like she's runnin' after something, which is hilarious cause she's runnin' on 'air' ... ... ... ...



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MIP Old Timer

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I do the same thing Pappy!! lol



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MIP Old Timer

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I had a LOT of drinking dreams in my first year of sobriety. They have slowed down somewhat now, but I still get them from time to time. Like you, BTY, in my dreams I was usually well aware that I was in AA and regretted the drinking. Our subconscious minds, reminding us!

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MIP Old Timer

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Oh man Phil(Nutty Buddy), you got me laugh'n so hard I 'bout lost my laptop ...

It wouldn't do to have us both in the same room, LOL ... but I'd like to see what'd happen, LOL ... ... ...



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