hello everyone. my name is jason im 38 from kansas. ive been a alcoholic and an drug addict since i was 15. ive had periods of sober time 2 years was my longest. im not the type of drunk who needs to drink everyday. but when i do watch out! its all or nothing. i have black outs and put myself in dangerous positions. it has cost me 5 dui's a marrage and two good jobs. even after all that you would think i would learn. this last bender lasted two months. drinking about every 3 days. sometimes i could control it but most times it turned out just like always terrible. i only have 7 days sober now but this time i really want it. ive been reading tons of books to help and going to meetings. meetings are very hard for me. i suffer from whats called social anxiety disorder. i take medication now and it helps so much. its not a drug you can get high on it evens out the chemicals in my brain. it helps but i hate being the center of attention or even being in a place full of people. this has always been a good excuse to drink so i can feel more comfortable. its very hard but i do it. on day seven now and i feel GREAT!!!! im living one day at a time. i know how to do this. i think im so used to being messed up my whole life its hard to change my brain. i hate the addictions who talk in my head. we all know what they say. ive started to do things differnt. im working out, eating better, and staying busy. i have a 8 year old son who i love to death. i dont want to be that drunk dad many of us have had. he has seen me drink only a couple times when he was little. i stay sober with my son on the weekends. but thats not a good excuse for being a good dad. hes growing up so fast and i dont want to spend another weekend hung over and tired not to enjoy are time together. i drink when im lonley, depressed, have extra money. i have a really good job as a supervisor now. i dont want to waist away another good job. i got my dl back yesterday. everything in my life is so positive. why i choose to ruin my life amazes me. im in a great place today and am happy to be sober today. thanks for listening.
Welcome to MIP JASON, Yes thats what sets us apart its not how much we use that makes us alcoholics(substance abusers) but how we react to the drug...Its always that 1st one ...we stay away from ,after that all bets are off............glad you showed up here,,,Keep coming back let us know how your doin!!
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Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.
